It's Cliff Richard
Show No. 2
Singing The Blues
In February Lyn faces what she has described as "the most awful day of my life." (Daily Mail, 6th December 1995, page 22). After five years of tax wrangles, Lyn finds herself owing £26,000 in tax. Her accountant advises her that she now has no alternative but to declare herself bankrupt. In 1998 Lyn told the Weekly News how she came to the decision:
"Somebody came to the door and Ryan grabbed hold of my hand and said, "Taxman, mummy."
Then he led me into the kitchen, so that we couldn't be seen. I looked down at Ryan and wondered what I was doing to him. That's when I decided to take the accountant's advice."
(Weekly News, 22nd August 1998, page 16)
Speaking about it in a radio interview, Lyn said:
"It was the worst day of my life. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. My father took me to the Court House in Slough and I stood there and it was as if it was all happening round me ... I thought my life was finished."
When Lyn returns home her mum is waiting.
"After the Court hearing, I went home. My mum was in the kitchen. She held out her arms and I just went to pieces."
(Weekly News, 22nd August 1998, page 13)
Having reached the lowest point of her career, the only way is up! On the very day of her Court appearance she receives a phone call from Bob Potter, Manager of the Lakeside Country Club, who offers her four weeks work.
"When I walked on stage the first time I actually got a standing ovation... I just stood there and cried. I honestly thought I was never going to work again."
With the support of her family and her manager, Malcolm Feld, Lyn puts her career back on the right track.
Meanwhile, a New Seekers' compilation, SuperStars (SUPER 049), is released on CD. Although it appears at first glance to be the group's original hits performed by the hit-making '70s line-up (Lyn Paul is pictured on the front sleeve), the small print tells another story:
"Some tracks of this compilation might not be the original hit recordings, but anyhow recorded by the original artists."
A CD with an identical track listing and the same warning had been released on the GOLD label the previous year. None of the tracks on either CD are the original hit recordings.
Although these New Seekers' CDs are a disappointment for Lyn Paul fans, the release of a Cliff Richard CD is music to the ears. On 31st August 1974 Lyn had appeared on the It's Cliff Richard Show (BBC1). Twenty years later a recording taken from the master tapes is issued on CD, featuring Lyn singing Who's Sorry Now?, You Made The Pants Too Long, Lipstick On Your Collar and Personality.
In September Lyn spends two weeks touring the UK with the ever-popular Guy Mitchell, best known for his 1956 number 1 Singing The Blues. The tour is mainly of England (including a return visit to the Lakeside Country Club) with an additional date in Scotland (Glasgow) and another in Wales (Rhyl).
- 15th September, Civic Hall, Winsford
- 16th September, New Pavilion Theatre, Rhyl
- 17th September, Floral Pavilion Theatre, New Brighton
- 18th September, Royal Concert Hall, Glasgow
- 19th September, Empire Theatre, Sunderland
- 22nd September, Assembly Hall, Tunbridge Wells
- 23rd September, Brentwood Centre, Brentwood
- 24th September, Lakeside Country Club, Camberley
- 25th September, Lewisham Theatre, London
- 26th September, Central Hall, Chatham
At Christmas Lyn stars in Dick Whittington at the Princess Theatre in Torquay. To get over the problem of being away from home, Lyn brings the family with her:
"My little boy Ryan and husband Alan are the loves of my life - we've simply moved down for six weeks with the Christmas tree, the TV and video, the lot." (Herald Express, 20th December 1994, page 4)
Allen Saddler's review in The Guardian singles Lyn out for special praise:
"Lyn Paul plays Dick Whittington with dash and spirit. She looks good and moves well and her singing is much better than in the average panto."
(The Guardian, 22nd December 1994)
Sandra Loy's review in the local Herald Express is even more enthusiastic: "the breath of fresh air for which we've been waiting ... the best principal boy Torbay has seen for many a year."
Other notable names in the cast are Paul Shane (known chiefly for his role as Ted Bovis in the TV comedy Hi-de-Hi) and veteran pantomime dame Wyn Calvin.
Princess Theatre, Torquay
In April 1994 the Manchester band Oasis confirms its arrival on the UK music scene with a début hit single Supersonic. The record makes a fleeting appearance in the charts, peaking at number 31. A second single, Shakermaker, makes more of an impression, storming into the chart at number 11 on 2nd July. To some ears it sounds very like the New Seekers' number 1 hit I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing, so much so that the song later lands the band in Court.
Judith Durham and The Seekers make a brief return to the UK album charts with a compilation entitled A Carnival Of Hits (EMI EMTV 83). The album, which includes both solo and group material, enters the chart on 23rd April and peaks at number 7.
|In the News - 1994
On 14th January the Duchess of Kent is received into the Catholic Church in a private service conducted by the Archbishop of Westminster, Cardinal Basil Hume. She is the first member of the British Royal Family to convert to Catholicism for more than 300 years.
Harry Nilsson, best known for his hits Everybody's Talkin' and Without You, dies on 15th January, aged 52.
Los Angeles is hit by a big earthquake on 17th January.
Football Manager Sir Matt Busby dies on 20th January, aged 84.
On 5th February 68 people are killed in a mortar-bomb attack on a crowded market in Sarajevo.
The Conservative MP for Eastleigh, Stephen Milligan, inadvertently kills himself during an auto-erotic sex act. He is found dead at his home at 64 Black Lion Lane, Hammersmith on 7th February by his secretary, Vera Taggart.
On 21st February UK MPs vote to lower the age of consent for gay men from 21 to 18. Edwina Currie's proposal to lower the age of consent to 16 is rejected by 307 votes to 280.
On 24th February, following a new tip-off about the disappearance of sixteen-year-old Heather West in 1987, police begin digging up the back garden of her parents' home in Gloucester.
On 25th February an Israeli gunman, Baruch Goldstein, massacres 29 Palestinians worshiping at a mosque in Hebron.
Eric Clapton performs at London's Royal Albert Hall for the 100th time on 28th February.
Having already been charged with the murder of his daughter Heather, Fred West is charged with two further murders on 1st March.
On 4th March four Arabs are jailed for the bombing of the World Trade Centre in February 1993.
On 9th, 11th and 13th March the IRA launches a series of mortar attacks on Heathrow Airport.
On Saturday, 12th March the Church of England ordains women priests for the first time. Angela Berners-Wilson is the first of 32 women to be ordained at a ceremony at Bristol Cathedral.
Schindler's List wins the Oscar for Best Picture at the 66th Academy Awards ceremony on 21st March.
Dan Hartman, best known for his 1978 hit Instant Replay, dies from an AIDS-related brain tumor on 22nd March, aged 43.
The BBC re-launches Radio 5 as Radio Five Live on 28th March.
The dead body of Kurt Cobain, lead singer of the grunge band Nirvana, is discovered at his home in Seattle on Friday, 8th April. In a suicide note he stated: "I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away."
Violence breaks out in Burundi and Rwanda between Hutus and Tutsis. The Presidents of both countries, Juvenal Habyarimana of Rwanda and Cyprian Ntayamira of Burundi, are killed in a plane crash on 6th April, leading to further violence, especially in Rwanda. On 14th April 20,000 Tutsis are massacred in Kibeho.
Ice skater John Curry dies an AIDS-related heart attack on 15th April, aged 44.
Richard Nixon dies on 22nd April, aged 81, following a stroke attack four days earlier.
On 25th April Rosemary West is charged with murder.
On 26th April elections are held in South Africa in which, for the first time, citizens of all races are allowed to vote.
On 30th April Ireland win the Eurovision Song Contest for the third year in a row. The winning song is Rock 'n' Roll Kids performed by Paul Harrington and Charlie McGettigan. The UK entry, We Will Be Free (Lonely Symphony) by Frances Ruffelle, finishes in 10th place. During the interval between the performances and the scoring, the theatre and television audiences are entertained by a performance of traditional Irish music and dance, Riverdance.
Civil war breaks out in Yemen on 5th May.
The Channel Tunnel linking the UK and France is formally opened by Queen Elizabeth II and by the French President François Mitterrand on 6th May.
Nelson Mandela is inaugurated as President of South Africa on 10th May.
A Russian-brokered cease-fire comes into effect at 12.01am on Thursday, 12th May, ending the Nagorno-Karabakh War between Nagorno-Karabakh (backed by Armenia) and Azerbaijan. Although the fighting comes to an end, the problem of the disputed territory remains, with Karabakh remaining under the jurisdiction of the unrecognized but de facto independent Republic of Nagorno-Karabakh.
The leader of the UK Labour Party, John Smith, dies on 12th May, aged 55, after suffering two heart attacks. Gordon Brown agrees not to oppose Tony Blair's bid to succeed him.
On 25th May the Camelot consortium wins the contract to run the UK's first national lottery starting in November.
Michael Jackson and Lisa Marie Presley get married on 26th May.
The dissident writer Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn returns to his native Russia on Friday, 27th May, after 20 years of exile in the United States. After arriving in Magadan, he embarks on a two-month train journey across the country to Moscow.
South Africa rejoins the Commonwealth on 1st June.
25 senior police, army and MI5 officers are killed in a helicopter crash on the Mull of Kintyre on 2nd June.
On 6th June remembrance ceremonies are held in Normandy to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the D-Day landings.
Nicole Brown Simpson, the estranged wife of the American football player O.J. Simpson, is stabbed to death outside her home in Los Angeles on 12th June. Her dead body is found along with that her friend, 25-year-old restaurant waiter Ron Goldman, shortly after midnight on 13th June.
On 17th June, following a 90-minute chase along freeway 405 in Los Angeles (broadcast live on TV news), O.J. Simpson is charged by the police with the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman. Simpson is found not guilty in October 1995.
French troops intervene in the Rwandan crisis on 23rd June.
Prince Charles admits to adultery in a TV interview with Jonathan Dimbleby on 29th June.
After 27 years in exile, Yasser Arafat makes a triumphant return to Gaza on Friday, 1st July. Four days later he visits the West Bank.
The leader of the People's Democratic Republic of Korea, Kim Il-sung, dies on 8th July. He is replaced by his son Kim Jong-il.
The comet Shoemaker–Levy 9 collides with Jupiter on 16th July, providing astronomers with the opportunity to witness the collision of two Solar System bodies for the first time.
A celebration is held in Westminster Abbey on 20th July to mark the return of South Africa to the Commonwealth.
On Thursday, 21st July Tony Blair is elected leader of the UK Labour Party, taking 57% of the vote in the leadership election. He becomes the youngest Labour leader since the Second World War.
Former Labour leader Neil Kinnock is appointed as an EU Commissioner on 29th July.
Norwich Central Library is destroyed by fire on 1st August. Thousands of historic documents are lost in the blaze.
On 14th August the terrorist known as "Carlos the Jackal" is captured by French secret service agents from a hospital bed in Sudan and flown to Paris to stand trial.
In a pioneering operation on 26th August a man in the UK is given the world's first battery-operated heart.
The Sunday Trading Act comes into effect on Sunday, 28th August, allowing shops in the UK to open legally on a Sunday for the first time.
On 31st August the IRA announce a cease-fire in Northern Ireland.
Entertainer and television presenter Roy Castle dies from cancer on 2nd September, aged 62.
Jessica Tandy, star of the films Driving Miss Daisy and Fried Green Tomatoes At The Whistle Stop Café, dies on 11th September, aged 85.
The Parti Québécois wins an overall majority in the elections for Quebec's National Assembly held on 12th September. The election result means that there will be a referendum to decide whether or not the French-speaking province should separate from the rest of Canada.
On the same day Whigfield becomes the first recording artist to enter the UK singles chart at number 1 with a début single. Saturday Night topples Love Is All Around by Wet Wet Wet from the top spot, ending its 15-week run as the UK's best-selling single.
On 14th September US singer Steve Earle is sentenced to a year in prison for possession of crack cocaine.
On 16th September Prime Minister John Major announces the end of the broadcasting ban on prescribed organisations including Sinn Féin.
852 people are killed on Wednesday, 28th September when a car and passenger ferry, MS Estonia, sinks in the Baltic Sea on its journey from Tallinn to Stockholm.
The Russian President, Boris Yeltsin, flies to Ireland on 30th September for a meeting with the Irish Prime Minister but is said to be too tired, and then too ill, to see him. The Taoiseach, Albert Reynolds, who is left waiting on the tarmac, meets the Russian Deputy Prime Minister, Oleg Soskovets, instead.
On 5th October an apparent mass suicide by members of the Order of the Solar Temple sect is discovered when 48 dead bodies are found at two locations in Switzerland. The cult leaders, Dr. Luc Jouret and Joseph di Mambro, are among the dead.
On 14th October the Nobel Peace Prize is awarded jointly to Yasser Arafat, Shimon Peres and Yitzhak Rabin for their efforts to create peace in the Middle East.
On 19th October 22 people are killed and 46 injured by a suicide bomb attack on a bus in Tel Aviv.
Israel and Jordan sign a peace treaty on 26th October.
In a referendum held in Sweden on 13th November 52.3% vote in favour of joining the European Union; in a referendum held in Norway on 27th and 28th November 52.2% vote to stay out.
Eurostar’s first London-to-Paris passenger service departs from Waterloo Station at 8.23am on 14th November, arriving in the French capital at least two minutes ahead of schedule.
An earthquake measuring 7.1 on the Richter scale strikes the island of Mindoro in the Philippines at 3.15am (local time) on 15th November.
On the same day members of the German Bundestag elect Helmut Kohl to a fourth term as Chancellor, but only by the narrowest of margins (341-340).
Albert Reynolds resigns as Taoiseach on 17th November, following the Labour Party's withdrawal from Ireland's coalition government the day before. He resigns as leader of Fianna Fáil two days later.
The BBC plays host to the UK's first national lottery draw on 19th November. The show is presented by Noel Edmonds, Anthea Turner and Gordon Kennedy.
The Angolan government and UNITA rebels sign the Lusaka Protocol in Zambia on 20th November, bringing to an end 19 years of civil war.
On 28th November the serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, who was serving 15 terms of life imprisonment, is bludgeoned to death by a fellow inmate at the Columbia Correctional Institution in Portage, Wisconsin.
Passengers and crew are ordered to abandon ship when fire breaks out aboard the Achille Lauro cruise liner on 30th November. Two people die and eight are injured.
The Russian army invades Chechnya on Sunday, 11th December in order to restore "constitutional order".
A four-month cease-fire comes into force in Bosnia on 23rd December.
On 30th December a pro-life activist armed with a gun, John Salvi, kills two women and injures at least five others when he opens fire at two neighbouring abortion clinics in Boston.
On New Year's Eve 3.5 million people crowd on to Copacabana beach in Rio de Janeiro for a concert by Rod Stewart.
|In the Charts
UK Chart débuts
- Sheryl Crow
- Green Day
|UK Best-selling Singles
- Ace Of Base
Don't Turn Around
- Ace Of Base
- Tori Amos
- Pato Banton
Baby Come Back
(Meet) The Flinstones
(from the film 'The Flinstones')
Girls and Boys
- Tony Braxton
- Bobby Brown
Two Can Play That Game
- Mariah Carey
The Rhythm Of The Night
- Crash Test Dummies
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
(from the film 'Dumb And Dumber')
- Sheryl Crow
All I Wanna Do
Things Can Only Get Better
- Celine Dion
The Power Of Love
- Celine Dion
- East 17
Stay Another Day
- Sophie B. Hawkins
Right Beside You
- Cyndi Lauper
Hey Now (Girls Just Want To Have Fun)
- Let Loose
Crazy For You
- C.J. Lewis
Sweets For My Sweet
- Lisa Loeb and Nine Stories
Stay (I Missed You)
- Manchester United Football Club
Come On You Reds
- Jimmy Nail
- Youssou N'Dour
featuring Neneh Cherry
- PJ & Duncan
Let’s Get Ready To Rhumble
I'll Stand By You
- Primal Scream
Rocks / Funky Jam
The Most Beautiful Girl In The World
- Reel 2 Reel featuring the Mad Stuntman
I Like To Move It
- Bruce Springsteen
Streets Of Philadelphia
- Stone Roses
- 20 Fingers
Short Dick Man
- 2wo Third3
I Want The World
- Wet Wet Wet
Love Is All Around
One Hit Wonders
- Tori Amos
Under The Pink
- Beautiful South
Carry On Up The Charts - The Best Of The Beautiful South
- Garth Brooks
- J.J. Cale
Closer To You
- Mary Chapin Carpenter
Stones In The Road
- Eric Clapton
From The Cradle
No Need To Argue
- Celine Dion
The Colour Of My Love
I Say I Say I Say
- Everything But The Girl
- Green Day
- Nanci Griffith
- Emmylou Harris
- The Mavericks
What A Crying Shame
Vauxhall And I
- Olivia Newton-John
- Sinéad O'Connor
- Pink Floyd
The Division Bell
- The Prodigy
Music For The Jilted Generation
- Bonnie Raitt
Longing In Their Hearts
- Eddi Reader
- The Rolling Stones
- The Seekers
A Carnival Of Hits
- Luther Vandross
|At the Movies
- The Adventures Of Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert
- Bullets Over Broadway (Woody Allen)
- Cool Runnings
- The Flinstones
- Forrest Gump
- Four Weddings And A Funeral
- Free Willy
- The Lion King
- Manhattan Murder Mystery
- The Mask
- Mrs. Doubtfire
- Pulp Fiction
- Schindler's List
- True Lies
- Wayne's World 2
Tony Award for Best Musical:
for Best New Musical:
City Of Angels
- Absolutely Fabulous
- Animal Hospital
- Birds Of A Feather
- The Brittas Empire
(Series 4 and 5)
- Crocodile Shoes
- Don't Forget Your Toothbrush
(USA and UK)
- The Five Mrs. Buchanans
- Harry Enfield And Chums
- Just William
- Knowing Me, Knowing You ... With Alan Partridge
- Men Behaving Badly
- Murder Most Horrid
- The National Lottery Live
- Pat And Margaret
- Pets Win Prizes
- Room 101
- Spitting Image
(Series 19 and 20)
- University Challenge
- The Vicar Of Dibley
- Waiting For God
of the Year:
Darts: Dennis Priestly beats Phil Taylor 6–1 in the final of the first World Championship organised by the Professional Darts Corporation (PDC).
John Part wins the British Darts Organisation (BDO) World Darts Championship.
Rugby Union: Wales win the Five Nations Championship.
Rowing: the University of Cambridge crew wins the annual Boat Race against Oxford for the second year in a row.
Horse Racing: Minnehoma, ridden by Richard Dunwoody, wins the Grand National.
Jockey Willie Carson wins the Derby, aged 51, riding the pre-race favourite Erhaab.
Snooker: Stephen Hendry beats Jimmy White in the final of the World Snooker Championship for the third year in a row. This year the score is closer, 18-17. Hendry wins the UK Championship for the third time, beating Ken Doherty 10-5 in the final.
Golf: José María Olazábal wins the 58th US Masters at Augusta, finishing 2 strokes ahead of the runner-up,Tom Lehman.
Ernie Els wins the US Open at Oakmont Country Club in Plum, Pennsylvania, beating Colin Montgomerie and Loren Roberts in a playoff for the title.
Nick Price wins the US PGA Championship and at the British Open Championship at Turnberry.
Football: Manchester United win the FA Carling Premier League Championship and the FA Cup, beating Chelsea 4-0 in the final.
Brazil win the World Cup.
Bobby Charlton is knighted.
Cycling: Miguel Indurain wins the Tour de France for the fourth time.
Boxing: Lennox Lewis wins the WBA World Heavyweight Championship.
Cricket: Brian Lara scores 375 runs against England at the Recreation Ground in Antigua, breaking the world record previously held by Sir Garfield Sobers.
Tennis: at Wimbledon the defending women's champion Steffi Graf is knocked out in the first round, losing to Lori McNeil, 7-5, 7-6. Conchita Martinez denies tennis legend Martina Navratilova a tenth women's singles title by winning the final in three sets (6-4 3-6 6-3). Navratilova retires in November, having won a record 167 singles and 165 doubles titles in her career.
Pete Sampras defeats Goran Ivanisevic in the men's singles final (7-6, 7-6, 6-0).
At the US Open Arantxa Sanchez Vicario beats Steffi Graf in the women's singles final; Andre Agassi beats Michael Stich in the men's final.
Athletics: the British athlete Diane Modahl, former Commonwealth gold-medallist in the 800m, is found guilty of taking a performance enhancing drug and banned from competing for four years.
Motor Racing: Ayrton Senna, three times the Formula 1 World Drivers' Champion, dies in a crash at the San Marino Grand Prix on Sunday, 1st May.
Michael Schumacher wins the Formula 1 World Drivers' Championship for the first time.
Man Booker Prize
How Late It Was, How Late
The Folding Star
George Mackay Brown
Beside The Ocean Of Time
Jill Paton Walsh
Knowledge Of Angels
Who said that?
A man hired to explain that you didn't make the money you did.
There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.
Money can only give happiness where there is nothing else to give it.
Jane Austen, 'Sense and Sensibility'
Money, it turned out was exactly like sex. You thought of nothing else if you didn't have it, and thought of other things if you did.
James Baldwin, 'Nobody Knows My Name'
We all need money, but there are degrees of desperation.
We had some money put aside for a rainy day, but we didn't know it was going to get this wet.
Jane Connell, 'Mame'
Never ask of money spent
Where the spender thinks it went.
Nobody was ever meant
To remember or invent
What he did with every cent.
Money talks, they say. All it ever said to me was 'Goodbye'.
Cary Grant (Ernie Mott), 'None But The Lonely Heart'
It is good to have money and the things that money can buy, but it's good, too, to check up once in a while and make sure you haven't lost the things that money can't buy.
George Horace Lorimer
The safest way to double your money is to food it over once and put it in your pocket.
Frank McKinney Hubbard
The most beautiful words in the English language are 'check enclosed'.
Money can't buy happiness. It can however rent it.
Pennies do not come from Heaven. They have to be earned here on earth.
I've been rich and I've been poor; rich is better.
The lack of money is the root of all evil.
The wheel of fortune turns round incessantly, and who can say to himself, I shall to-day be uppermost.
All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me ... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.
What happens is not as important as how you react to what happens.
The lowest ebb is the turn of the tide.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.
The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.
The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning.
Ivy Baker Priest
You have to accept whatever comes and the only important thing is that you meet it with the best you have to give.
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. Fields
Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
Joshua J. Marine
Someone who never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.
Arnold H. Glasgow
One who overlooks your failures and tolerates your successes.
One who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Patience and Perseverance
Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.
John Quincy Adams
Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men of talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination are omnipotent.
Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained.
Through perseverance many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure.
I will persist until I succeed. Always will I take another step. If that is of no avail I will take another, and yet another. In truth, one step at a time is not too difficult.... I know that small attempts, repeated, will complete any undertaking.
There is nothing like employment, active indispensable employment, for relieving sorrow.
Jane Austen, 'Mansfield Park'
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
Pick yourself up,
Dust yourself off,
Start all over again.
Dorothy Fields, 'Pick Yourself Up'
Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over.
F. Scott Fitzgerald
When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
Maxim adopted by Joseph P. Kennedy
The real challenge is not simply to survive. Hell, anyone can do that. It's to survive as yourself, undiminished.
The worst is not,
So long as we can say,
'This is the worst.'
William Shakespeare, 'King Lear' (Act IV, Scene I)
At eighteen our convictions are hills from which we look; at forty-five they are caves in which we hide.
F. Scott Fitzgerald, 'Bernice Bobs her Hair'
The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you'll grow out of it.
Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough!
It isn't fit for humans now,
There isn't grass to graze a cow.
Swarm over, Death!
Well... may I ask what you were hoping to see out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window? Sydney Opera House perhaps? The Hanging Gardens of Babylon? Herds of wildebeest sweeping majestically...
Basil Fawlty (John Cleese), 'Fawlty Towers'